Santorini – a place to reflect

I want to share with you a very special trip John and I just took to Santorini a small island 2 hours by boat north of Crete. I have wanted to see this island for many years and was thrilled to make this trip at this point in my life. Here is how I experienced the beauty of .

Getting up at 5.30 Friday morning after a sleepless night due to some very sad news the day before was hard and not knowing what the day would bring made me a little nervous. But at the same time I was determined to make this trip special not just for me but for us.

As we left the house and drove towards Iraklion from where we would take the boat, I knew this was going to be a good trip. John and I took our time to wake up as we drove along but as the sun started to wake us up more and more we started to talk and laugh.

When we got to Iraklio we found parking right away, found the boat and had our seats in no time. We had exceptional calm weather and I am really appreciative of that. I don’t do well with high seas and my day would have been less pleasant had the wind be strong.  But we had a great time, laughing and joking on our way there. We were relaxed and light-hearted feeling the freedom of the adventure.

When we arrived in Santorini we were met with an amazing view from the harbour. The rocks standing high right in front of us in a majestic way. The only downside….. we had to go up the sik sac road….. not good if you suffer from fear of heights….. But we made it and our driver and hotel owner told us things about the island on the way up, and he made the first minutes of our stay on the island great.

The hotel was right outside Fira (Thira) the main town on the island. We were happy to see that the people there were very friendly and helpful. Within an hour we had a rental car and were on our way to make our own experiences.

We drove of towards Ammunda a fishing village below Oia. Words cannot describe the pictures we took. Not only the ones we now have on the computer but the ones you have in your head. We stood there looking at the water, the other islands close by, the town up the hill and we knew we had chosen the right place to go for our weekend.

After this we went to Oia the picturesque town on top of the hill. We had a late lunch and we just sat there and enjoyed the view, the atmosphere and the sounds. This little town was bustling with life but in a way you just have to feel. Words will not allow me to tell you the feeling. I sat there and just allowed myself to take it all in, to enjoy being there with the love of my life and to feel so blessed to be there at that very moment.

After lunch we walked around the town and took more pictures and I think I can say without a doubt that this is place that you easily could visit more than once. Then we got back in the car, stopped on the way to get a few snacks and went back to the hotel to relax. We were so full of impressions that we fell asleep very early.

The next morning we took off early – after a nice breakfast, that our hotel owner made sure we ate…. to explore the rest of the island. We went up to the top in Pirgos and then toward the lighthouse in Faros. We passed the vineyards with the grapes on the ground. In small circular branches the grow there protected from the winds that are very strong here. Before the lighthouse we stopped at the red beach, another amazing place where you surely could see the impact the volcano have had on this place. Again at the light house the view were breathtaking. I just had to sit there for a moment to take it all in. I look at the endless ocean, the color of blue that now sits in my mind like no other color. I smell the wind, feel the sun and look at the entire island from this point. How can you not feel like you are the most lucky person in the world at this moment? I know I did.

We went back and stopped first at the Boutari vineyard to taste some vines. It was a good experience even if we didn’t like all the samples. This is a vine we always likes so it was great to hear a little more about it. We also stopped at the Santo Vines because we were told this was the place to buy the vines. We took a tour of the factory which was ok. It is all so industrialised now that it mainly was huge barrels of steel. But after that we sat and had a glass of vine and enjoyed yet another amazing place on the island. From here we could see both the north end and the south end where we were just a few minutes ago.

Sitting here nothing could have disturbed the peace I felt. I knew that what ever this life brings nothing will ever be able to take this experience from me. We talked about how lucky we are being able to enjoy these things in our life. We have each other, our health and the funds to go places. How blessed are we!!!

From here we went to the east side of the island. Another vineyard this time it was the Vine Museum. That was very interesting but the vines there were not to our liking. We drove off getting a short look at Kamari and then we went to our hotel.

We rested by the pool for a few hours and then after a shower we went back to Oia to see the famous sunset. We found a great restaurant and just as we were getting ready to order our dinner our camera went out of battery. So John took off and bought a disposal camera just for this evening. We laughed about it and told ourselves that this would be the reason to come back. We ate an amazing dinner with a fantastic view and we truly enjoyed the sunset. 

I don’t know that the sunset here is better than anywhere else but I do believe we seldom take the time to enjoy it where we live. Do you? Do you take the time once in a while to stop and just look at the sun go down? I know that most of us take if for granted and forget to enjoy the amazing things that is right in our back yards. I challenge you to take the time to catch a sunset this week and to enjoy it – remember it is free!!!

Sunday we spend in Fira walking the small narrow streets up and down the hill-side. Small shops with lots of things to look at, restaurants with offers to eat with a view and donkeys that would take you to the small old harbour for a  trip to the volcanic islands just minutes away from shore. We returned to the hotel to take a shower and then it was back to the boat. Our weekend was over and with a very calm sea we returned to Iraklio and from there to Kalathas.

I want to thank my dear husband for an amazing trip. For being the man he is and for making this a weekend to remember. I love him very much and appreciate the life he is making possible for us. I am proud of him every day of my life and I wish him nothing but happiness.

For all of you who have taken the time to read this, please know that I want you all to enjoy your time on this planet. Life is too short and the choices we make will determine the way we experience it. I hope for all of you that you may enjoy even the small things, embrace the challenges you face and know we life now, not in the  past and not in the future.

Transformational Breathwork

Hello everyone.

I just have to share this with you…… an experience like no other and something I would recommend to everyone I know. Keep reading and you will understand why…

 The other day my dear friend let me experience what she does for others. What she has trained for and what comes very natural for her. I have always known that she is something special and this experience just confirmed it once again. Not only is she a great and wonderful friend, she is amazing at what she does.

This was a session in transformational breath work. And wow – I thought I understood what this was all about but come to show that hearing about it and feeling it, are two very different things. Some things you just have to feel to fully appreciate and understand.

She placed me on the floor  and the session started. She told me how to breathe and even if it felt a little funny at first, I soon began to feel the effect. The was talking in my ear things that just made me relax and look inward. She pushed on different points on my body and at times I wanted to say av, av but something stopped me. I felt kind of good at the same time. I felt my body and mind opening up and I saw things about myself that I did not expect. What an amazing thing – I would never have thought that it was possible to open a person up in this way. I felt as I also have from reflexoligy - the touches and the words made my blood rush around creating a kind of tingle in the back of my head. I was in heaven…. even with the pain she made me feel at times. At times my body started to tremble and I could not control it – and I didn’t want to control it I just wanted to experience it all full on. She made me move in a special way to regain control of my body and all I can say is wow. How interesting this was to be as much in control of my body as I am in my everyday life to let go and still be ok. This was new for me and something I will never forget.  

I saw my breathing change and I felt how my body and mind was more open and relaxed. It was as if I could see deeper into myself and see where I was holding back and where I had fears and reservations. This was a new experience for but trust me it will not be the last. You cannot imagine what this can help you with if you are open and willing to be truthful with yourself and look at everything that comes up. As strange as it might seem this is a great experience.

I felt so free and open when the 45 minutes were over and as we talked about my thoughts I realized that for the first time in a long time someone had touched me in a way that let me step onto another level with myself. She managed to open me up to a new awareness which I know is going to move me further than I was expecting. I am so thankful for having done this and I am so thankful that I am lucky to have her in my life. I feel extremely honored to know her and to say that I am her biggest fan is as close as I can get to letting her know what she means to me.

I hope you all will do this. You will get insight to so much new about yourself and if you let it this will take you beyond where you are and move you to being even more honest and authentic with your life. So from me to you this is a challenge and a note to dare be more than you think you can be.

Transformational Breath Work……… what an experience - do it and do it now.

Trip to Florence

A few weeks back my husband and I went on a trip to Florence. It only took us 4 hours to drive up there and as we so often discover just leaving Naples the Campania region peace and relaxation finds us. It is a beautiful drive going north. First passing Rome and then going into Tuscany region. What a difference in nature.

We took our time driving, enjoying each others company and the music. My husband had worked all night but still stayed awake talking to me and enjoying the sights. We found our hotel easy and what a great place. It had everything you can wish for and for me reflecting on how interesting it is that when you have an open mind you will never get disappointed!! It almost seem to help you see and enjoy the things you encounter in a brand new light. And so we did. We checked in and the people at the front desk were so friendly and helpful and showed us where to go that evening. We took a small stroll towards the town and even with the fresh winter weather we enjoyed the walk.

The next morning we woke up to a blue sky and a sun shining at us with much love. It was still cold but the sun always seem to bring beauty to everything you see. And it sure did on this day. We walked for more than 9 hours from sight to sight, enjoyed a beautiful park, walked along the river and stood in awe in front of the sculpture of David. What a treat. As you walk into the square where the Duomo stands you feel your breath is taken away. This is a beautiful church and as both my husband and I noted we felt honered to see these sights in real life. It is truely a gift in this life.

I hope you enjoy the pictures below and I hope you will take time to visit Florence yourself. Well, David you will have to imagine because you are not allowed to take pictures of him. Did I mention it was Valentines weekend? Well, you might guess when you see the picture of John and Cupit!! It was such a great day and even if our legs were a little sore after walking all day I would do it again anytime.

On the day we left we toured the countryside of Tuscany and even in winter this is a fantastic place. I can still remember watching the movie “Under the Tuscan sun” and I have to agree that the nature here is just as you see it in the movie. Wow, we sure got a treat.

My dear husband and I had a great weekend there and I can highly recommend that you go visit. As our stay in Italy is on its last leg (we transfer in October) we are taking full advantage of the time we have left. In a few weeks we will head to Venice, where we are going to meet a couple of friends from Denmark. We look forward to seeing Venice and to seeing our friends.

Being far away from great friends is a challenge that we deal with in this way. We make sure to see them when we have a change, write often, call often and invite them to visit us where ever we are in the world. We admit to spending lots of time together and I am happy that both my husband and I enjoy each other’s company. But when we have a change to meet friends we take it and I am sure we are going to have a wonderful time.

I will write more about our trip there when we get back.

Please enjoy the pictures.

Dorte

Accountability

Oh my it has been a long time since I have taken the time to reflect on the great world of coaching. I have over the last few weeks been attending the class on accountability and after some reflection I am ready to see if you would like to do the same.

What do you think when you hear the word accountability? Do you feel that “oh no now someone expects you to do something” or do you see it as a positive thing? After asking myself these questions I realized that I actually don’t mind being accountable. I like that I know what is expected of me and I like that I have someone to answer to. This makes me be more committed to the task and it makes me make plans to get it done. There is of course the kind of accountability that you don’t ask for. When people have expectations for you that they don’t tell you about. Then later they come and ask if you have done it and you look like one big question mark???????

For me taking responsibility for getting something done and by that claiming accountability is a great thing. I like it especially when it is about things I love to do. Ofcourse I also make excuses for not doing something but when I tell others about it or if I promise something to someone I am more likely to get it done. I set up a structure or plan of how to do it and I work with the plan.

But how do you feel? Have you ever thought what being accountable means to you? Positive or negative?

I would like to challenge you to try to ask you this question. How do I hold myself accountable for the dreams and plans I have in my life? Do I tell myself that if I don’t do it I this is the consequence? Or do you only set up a plan of how to celebrate it? Do you like to let others help you by telling them what you plan to do or do you just keep it to yourself? Ask yourself how many times you planed to do something but didn’t do it because you didn’t feel accountable to yourself?

This is a very interesting subject and I love to get your input on it. In class Bill Turpin – our facilitator – came up with this new definition of the word accounability: 
A personal choice to raise above ones circumstances and demonstrate the ownership necessary for achieving desired results; to see it, to own it, solve, it and  to do it!!

I love that and it for me it is about owning it. You have a responsibility to yourself to make your dreams come true and therefore you have to hold yourself accountable for how you do it.

As coaches we cannot be accountable for what our clients do but we have to help them understand that they are accountable for themselves and the results the achieve.

I hope this gives you reason to think about how you hold yourself accountable for your own dreams and I hope you will let me know what you think. If you have certain ways you like to hold yourself accountable I would love to hear about it.

Have a great day and make sure you remember you are responsible for making it just that - GREAT

Dorte

Underlying Automatic Commitments

A few words before I go on vacation.

This week I took another class about the topic Underlying Automatic Commitments. This is a very interesting subject and one that can give us all lots of reflection. For me this is something that I enjoy but at the same time it can be hard to realize some of the things we do and why we do them or more interesting….. why we don’t!!!

What is this all about, you might ask? Well, that is the interesting thing. It is different for all of us but the point is that we are not aware of these underlying automatic commitments and because of that we sometimes end up not doing what we really want to do. Or we constantly encounter obstacles that keep us from getting something we want. The fact that it is underlying just make them so hard for us to see : )

Let me give you an example from my own life – years before I started my journey to become a life coach – from the time when I spend time in the mountains on a rock, on the beach staring at the waves or in “my apartment corner” for lots of self reflection.

After my divorce I wanted to understand more about myself. I wanted to know why I couldn’t achieve the things I really wanted in my life. Why I couldn’t make my marriage work and I wanted to know and understand the true unknown Dorte. The person I was afraid to show the world.

I came along really good even if it was a hard, hard time. It was not always fun to see things about myself especially when it was things I was not proud of. For me there were many things I had to try to understand and slowly I worked through them, learning to respond different to situations and people in my life. This helped me to be more aware of being a true person. (Now don’t think that I have worked through them all – I keep learning every day!!)

One thing I needed to do was letting people see the true Dorte and not the one I thought they wanted me to be. My underlying automatic commitment was that deep down I didn’t think that being my true self was good enough. So in order for me to make people like me I ended up showing them what I thought they wanted to see. But what I was doing was holding my true self back and the result was that no one really knew ME.

So realizing this, I started to change and it took a lot of hard work to finally being ok with ME, with everything that meant. But I did it and I felt great. So taking this new found knowledge I thought I was ready for a new man in my life. This was a long process – we are now talking 1 ½ year after I started working with myself.

Starting to date was very hard for me because at this point I knew what I wanted (and not wanted) and one thing held me back from getting just that….. another underlying commitment!!! This one took longer to discover because it was something a little deeper than others that I had encountered. I found that I was committed to only meeting “bad” men because I didn’t believe that I was worth being treated like a queen. Deep down I didn’t feel that I deserved it and because of that I didn’t meet anyone that I saw a future with. I couldn’t understand this because I felt that with all the work I did I was ready to meet the MAN that I would spend the rest of my life with.

So I took another good look inside myself and discovered this commitment. I saw that I had done this in other relationships before and that if I wanted a true relationship I had to work on this underlying commitment – now so underlying anymore. I had to feel that I was worth everything, that I was an exceptional woman and that I DID deserve the best. So with this new knowledge I started looking again….. and guess what…… shortly after I ran into a man who I for the first time in my life dared to show my true self too. This was a big day for me, scary but at the same time very honest. And he didn’t run away!!! It turned out he was not afraid of the true me, he thought I was worth everything and he treated me like a queen from our first date. This man is John, who I am married to today : ) 

So what I am trying to say is that is was worth all the work and I don’t regret a moment of tears and heartache because it made me the person I am today – one I like much better.

So what I want to challenge you all to do is to look if there is things that you don’t do or things you want to accomplice but never get to? Are there things that keep getting in the way and what are they? Maybe you too have some underlying automatic commitments that keep you “stuck” or keeping you from reaching your goal? What would it do for you to be aware of these commitments?

I think it is important to understand these because they can cover over a lot of things. I think once we are aware of them we can understand a lot and also we will see if the things we think we are committed to are really something we are committed to and not just something we think we are.

Wow, does this make any sense to you?

I know this is a deep, deep topic but for me it is very important. I know I am a better and more true person for knowing at least a few of mine and I am learning every day.

Please to free to comment on this blog – maybe you have a interesting point, we all can learn from.

Take care and have a great day.

 

 

 

Trip to Rome

Me by the Spanish Steps

John by the Trevi Fountain

The Pantheon

St. Peters Square

Me in my paper pants

Inside the Basilisa

The Trevi Fountain

The Colloseum

John inside the Colloseum

The end of the Palentine

 

Hi Everyone

 

After checking in we put on our walking shoes and took off. We took the metro to Palazzo de Popolo. (You have to excuse my spelling mistakes!!) Camera was out and as the best tourist we could be we started our picture taking. There is just so much to take pictures of in Rome and it is hard to stop once you start. We walked from here on down to the Spanish Steps, to the Trevi Fountain and to the Pantheon. Piazza Navone was close so we walked there to and from there we strolled over to the Tiber river. After a short rest here on the bridge we noticed that the Vatican was just around the corner. So of course we decided to walk over there…. Mind you that by now we had already been walking for about 3 hours but who was noticing??!!

It was not 5 pm and I didn’t think we would have a change to get in. I remembered the last time I was there and the line was 2.5 hours out to see the St. Peters Basilica. We walked in to the Piazza and we couldn’t believe it….. The Piazza was almost empty. So we walked over to the Basilica and realized that I was not dressed to go into the church. We quickly bought a pair of paper pants and a shirt with sleeves and we walked right in. No line and lots of room in the church. I have to say that this was amazing. I have never seen such a huge church and the art in there is amazing. I don’t have a lot of knowledge of art but no doubt this must be heaven for people who have this as a passion. Still we stood there and it was hard not to let a tear run down my face. I told my husband that I didn’t quite understand what was doing this to me (I am not a religious person) but something moved me. He understood me and told me he had the same feeling. You just know you are in a very special place and that you are very lucky to be able to experience it.

We stayed in there for 2 hours and when they announced they were closing we left. It was amazing and we enjoyed it very much.

After an expensive dinner we headed to our hotel where we fell asleep as soon as we laid down.

Sunday morning we headed for the Colosseum. Here we spend a long time – again we were lucky there was hardly any line to get in – and we even went to the Palatine across the road. There is just so much history here that you have to sit for a minute to take it all in. And so we did. It was hot in Rome – 33 Celsius – but with water and a quick snack we managed. Going through the Palatine we noticed a huge building at the very end. We kept coming closer and despite the fact that we were tired from a lot of walking we went there. As we turned the corner our jaws dropped. This is a fairly new monument dedicated to the unknown soldier. It was so amazing and big that you cannot imagine. We walked all the steps up to the top and with a view of the city we enjoyed a cold beer and rested our feet for a minute.

We were taking it all in and for only 2 days we had impressions to last us a long time. We went back to the hotel for a short rest and decided to go out for a burger dinner. Yes, when you live in Italy sometimes you just want – that a burger from Burger King!!! We were walking down the street and my husband stopped dead in his tracks….. ”I know you”, he said to a very tall man who came towards us. I didn’t recognize the man at first but after a few words between him and my husband it was clear that we were standing across from Chris Gardner. The man who wrote the book Pursuit of happiness that was the script for the movie with Will Smith. We had a nice conversation with him, his wife and his daughter before we moved on to a burger. This gentleman was so nice and down to earth, that he even handed my husband his phone to call his mother in New Orleans when he learned that we could not get up with her. (The hurricane was approaching and we had not been able to reach anyone there). It was such a pleasure to meet him and I was impressed that he took the time to talk with us.
We went back to the hotel and the next morning we were back in the train station. The ride back was fine and we were picked up by our friends in Villa Literno.

We had a great trip and even if Rome is only 2 hours away from Naples the difference is huge. We truly enjoyed ourselves and I am sure we will be back again before we leave Naples.

I will tell you all that going to Rome is something you should do at least once. It is so easy to get around and there is just so much to see. You don’t have to be interested in the arts or the architecture – just to be there is a special. I hope you get a change to do what we did and enjoy Rome.

My biography

 

Hello everyone. I just finished my biography for my coaching journey and I would like you to read it and comment on it. I will appreciate all the feedback you can offer. Thank you and enjoy.

 

STEP BY STEP LIFE COACHING

Dorte Ellegaard Richardson

Dorte is a 40 year young Danish woman who recently has reached another goal in her life. Being a coach may not be new to her but having done the official training makes it just that – official.

Being married to John a sailor in the US Navy has required living in many different countries. She understands how moving, learning new cultures and new languages, finding a new network and feeling at home

“where ever I hang my hat”, can affect you whether you are relocating for a short or long period of time.

She has 22 years of experience as a fitness instructor and a lifetime experience in doing sports – competitive and for health. She has worked with people in all areas of life and has helped countless people reaching their goals.

She is considered to be a great listener, open and free of judgment, with lots of insight. She is able to meet people at the stage where they are in their journey and has an ability to understand and help others clarify their passions and desires. She is a person you will feel comfortable being coached by.

Dorte has a major in business but realized her mission in life was to work closely with people on a personal level. She set out to pursue her dreams and made her passion her livelihood.

Working for years as a consultant for a fitness company, doing all the aspects of fitness made her goals even more clear. Hosting meetings with CEO’s of companies to implement fitness into their workplace, helping them realize the benefits of providing fitness to their workers. Working with future instructors and doing seminars to promote a healthy way of living has given her much experience in public speaking and relating to people in all levels of life. She has an ability to communicate with people with totally different backgrounds making them feel comfortable and at ease in her present. This made her understand that she needed to devote herself to personal training, coaching and public speaking.She took the initiative to start a gym which she had for a number of years. She managed the gym, teaching fitness to clients and instructors, taking care of the many different business aspect and having a staff of 30 volunteer instructors to care for.

One of the biggest challenges in her life was facing not being able to have children. Faced with years of infertility treatment gives her first hand understanding of the hardship it is. Changing her perspective on having children gives her an amazing ability to support others in the same situation. Many might feel lost but she has been able to move her focus and remain positive in life.

Dorte feels passionate about helping other people embracing their own strengths and reaching their goals. She loves to see others succeed and takes great pleasure in being on the sideline cheering them on. With all her life experiences she challenges you to go for your passions in life to realize just how great life is.

 

 

Truth vs. fraud

Again a module with a lot of material for deep reflection. I must say that before I read this I didn’t realize just how much it means to be honest (maybe authentic is a better word) and how many little things we are not 100% honest about – to others and maybe especially to ourselves. And even if we have – in our opinion – a good reason I now understand how we are really cheating ourselves from the reward it is to be that honest.

In this module we were asked how honest (authentic) we really are? How much of the time and how much of the truth do we tell? Why is it that it is so hard for us to tell the truth 100% and 100% of the time? I sure had to look deep into this about myself and I know that I am not 100% honest 100% of the time. Why is that? Well, I am now aware of why it is so for me and even if it is hard to admit we all have what we think is a really good reason. So how about you? Do you have the guts to look into why you are not always honest?

I dare to say that some of us are afraid that if we tell the truth we might not be loved!!! Can you imagine if everyone knew that you sometimes cry over small things, that they knew you are afraid of ants (or what ever your secret fear might be)?  Or that they knew that we are not always as strong as we let on? What would they think of us? Maybe we even have goals that are not really our goals but something we do so others can view us in a certain way? That has been true for me and maybe for some of you also but it is never to late to change your ways.

We always talk about how we want others to love us for who we are, but if we are not 100% honest about who we are even to ourselves, how are they really truely going to know us? We put up this ”front” and other people never get a change to know the real you. Have you ever had someone say “you don’t really know me” or maybe you even thought about others ”they dont know the real me at all”!!!! I know I have and I now see that I have been putting up a “front” because I was afraid that being me was not enough, I wanted to keep that picture of me that I thought people wanted to see. How I have been missing out!!

I agree that there are many reason to hold back the truth. Fear is the largest one no doubt and I see that for myself as well. Fear we might loose a friend, hurt someone we love, even discovering our own imperfections or having others see our imperfections.

But what happens if we dont tell the truth or live our lives authentic? I think it is true as stated in this module: We risk living a lie and doing things we really dont want to do. We are being loved or liked for someone we are not and we might take on more than we realistically can overcome. We make friendships only whit people who aren’t true and we start negative patterns we can’t get out of easily.

Think about this for a moment….. this is some of the advanteges of telling the truth:
Constant feeling of freedom – you can just be who you truly are.
Grow potentially as an individual.
Be a good example to yur peers and your children.
Allowed to get into deeper relationship.

What happens when we are willing to look deep into ourselves to “find the truth”? I think that there are so many benefits that we all need to do just that. Look deep! In this module they talk about these benefits and let me just mention a few that struck my core:
1. It creates a possibility for true acceptance and real love.
2. See who you really are.
3. Realize what you truly love and don’t love.
4. Lose those who drein you out.
5. Progress – you grow and see more truth, grow and see more truth……. and so on.
6. Give others a gift – something real – as opposed to something false.
7. Feel free, clear and honest.

The truth is how each one of us see it. It is based on who we are and what our experiences are in life have been. So in reality perception is our truth.

Let me list a few ways we can build trust and get rid of doubt and see if you always do these things in your life (you might discover that you are not as truthful as you thought).
1. Be open and honest. Be truthful to yourself, and be yourself.
2. Keep promises.
3. Dont talk behind one’s back. Be loyal to those who are absent.
4. Be big enough to make apologies when you are wrong or make a mistake.
5. Take responsibility for what you are saying and feeling. Own it by saying “I…..”
6. Forgive yourself and others.
7. Trust that you are wise and have value to add to the universe.

So how can we be us – the one we truely are? How do we let people see us and accept us just as we are? And maybe more importantly how do we see and accept ourselves for “just who we are”? I find this to be very risky at times but the answer is simple – we have to tell the truth – we have to be authentic even with the fears it brings. It is like they say – “The truth will set you free”.

I hope you will take a few moments to reflect on this topic. I think it is really important and wow did it make a difference in how I view myself and I am sure I will do different in the future.

Our trip to Abruzzo

 OFF THE BEATEN PATH

There are so many beautiful places in Italy that are just not on the map. This is just one of them. I found this place online looking for a place for me and my husband to stay for the weekend of 4^th of July.

With no expectations and with a true open mind ready to take in whatever the weekend had in store for us, we headed out from Naples destination Abruzzo. We wanted to go the alternative route so no main highways for us. But believe it or not that was the greatest decision we made.

The road going through the mountains had some of the most spectacular scenery we have ever seen in Italy and it was absolutely an amazing spectacle to behold. The nature with an abundance of trees, mountains, birds, and the smell of the flowers were so breathtaking and powerful that the stress of military life had vanquished with only an hours drive and the stress and hustle and bustle of good ol Napoli seemed far far away. The sharp corners climbing the last mountain is something to overcome if you have problems with heights but once there you forget all about it.

On this mountain top in Abruzzo in the small village of Decontra with the National Park of Majella as its neighbor, we found our heaven. Our ultimate destination for the weekend was the Agriturismo Pietrantica.

As we got out of our car we were greeted by our host Marisa with a great smile and happy that we finally found her. This little community was taken right out of a fairytale. Old houses – and not many of them – the people working in the gardens tending to the business of farming, their dogs running around freely. We settled in our room which was simple and just like it needed to be for a place like this. Our bed were nice and soft and the view from the window was amazing.

As the sun was getting ready to set we took of on a small walk. Right up the hill we could see down the gorge and after that it’s hard to explain just how beautiful it is there.

The smells and the fresh air of the mountains will make you sleep like a baby. You might feel a little more winded than usual but rest assure that it is just the altitude.

Marisa kindly had made reservations for us at the only restaurant in town – Il Cervo. We went there to find that no English was spoken. We don’t care because we just order as we know best in our best Italian. The food was amazing and so different from what we experience in Naples. We tried some stewed stag, some wonderful vegetables and potatoes and the local white vine was the icing of the cake.

So what do you do in a beautiful place like Decontra when you were not prepared for hiking heaven??? Well, you enjoy all the other things there are to see in the area. We went to Caramenico Terme, not only an extremely “cute” village but also just a great place to relax. They have the thermal baths where you can go and enjoy yourself, many restaurants, shops and the atmosphere is so relaxing and soothing. But the best part of the area is the crispness of the air during mid-summer but of course we all know that’s due to the high altitude.

Going back down to sea level only took a short time and we wanted to see the Adriatic Sea. We went to Pescara where we parked next to the train station and walked to the water. Shops where on both sides of the walking street but I have to let you know the prices were a little steep. Many designer stores, bars and hotels led the way. The beach was packed and as we sat and got something cold to drink people was still arriving there by the dozens. The water was nice and fresh but the place a little crowded.

After a nice day at sea level we headed back into the mountains. We had already made many friends there, guests as well as the people working there and next door. Everyone were so friendly and when invited to have dinner at the Agriturismo Saturday night we were thrilled. All the guests and even people visiting their homes in Decontra came for a very well cooked dinner made by Marisa with only the help of her husband Camillo. Marisa surprised all with an incredible spread fit for a king and his court, the food absolutely blew us away and it was a treat we will not forget. Marisa even makes her own pasta and let me tell you the treat it was to eat at her table. Her wine was homemade and so was the after dinner shots. Again something to try for everyone.

Sunday afternoon was time to head back to good old Napoli. Reluctantly we packed our things, and decided to take the scenic route back again – only this time we had found another route. Marisa promised me that it was not to bad with the heights but I think she has a different measure than most people. So again if you have problems with heights don’t go this way. But for me it was absolutely beautiful. We went through the National Park and words are not big enough for the views there.

We even met a little donkey just minding his/her own business of the side of the road and he/she fit in like the most natural thing in the world. No wonder it was wagging its tale – wouldn’t you if you had no worries in the world?

Going back there are many small towns we wanted to visit but that has to wait for our next trip and there will be another trip to Decontra. Next time we are bringing all the hiking gear ready to enjoy the volumes of interesting trips they offer.

If you ever want to go to a place where you can think and reflect this is the place. No disturbances and a calmness to soothe your soul, Decontra is a wonderful choice. For us an exhilarating experience meeting people in a place that is truly a piece of paradise on earth only 4 hours drive from Naples.

For further information about accommodation see:

 

 

www.agripietrantica.com or www.31decontra.com  (the next door B&B)

 

Just one of the beautiful views

The donkey wagging his/her tale

Our accomodation Agriturismo Pietrantica

In the restaurant Il Cervo

The streets of Caramenico Terme

My beloved husband made it to the top

The work of John…. we love these pictures

You cannot imagine how breath taking the views are

Responsibility vs. blame

What an interesting class and very interesting reading. Let me tell you all, that this is something we all can learn from…. maybe we would all get along better, if we just took a little more responsibility.

The claim of this module is:
Respontibility = freedom and choice, 
Blame = loss of freedom and dis-empowerment

When I first read this I was a little surprised but as I got into it I know it makes perfect sense. If we take responsibility for our part in any given situation we have the choice to do something about it (we have the power) where as if we blame it on someone or something else we just sit back and wait for them to fix the problem (we give the power to the other person or to something out of our control).

Why is this so important? Well, for me it is important to have the choice and the power to fix something and I realize that if I want that power, I have to be aware of my part (small or big) in anything that comes up.

We are never totally blameless!!! We might not be the cause of the problem but we always have a small part in it. Even if it is just how we antagonize the other person.

Think about this for a moment…. Does this make sense to you? Have you ever blamed something on someone else for something? Can you honestly say that you did not have even a little part in it? Did it make you feel any better to blame them for the problem or did it leave you sort of powerless? Where you just sat back and waited for them to fix it so we could move on?

I would love to hear from you because I feel this is something that is very important in all the relationships we have in life. I see now how this can give us a lot of freedom, if we just become more aware of what we do and say – take responsibility for our part.

There is of course things in our life we have no power over – the weather, what others do, and so on, but just think about the things you do have power over. If we view responsibility as a privilege instead of a burden we might just see the possibilities and choices in our lives.

I love the quote of this module and I will leave you with it today. Please write me and tell me about your thoughts I know you have some!!!!

“Responsibility is asking: What have I done to cause or impact this? And what can I now do about it?” Coachfucious

See you all later and have a great day.